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The Green Hornet (2011) ReviewThe Green Hornet movie is one that I've been looking forward to for years. It's been rumored to be coming since the early 90's. It went through numerous incarnations that somehow didn't make it. From actors like George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg as the Hornet to Jet Li and Stephen Chow as Kato. A script was written by no less than Kevin Smith that was recently made into the first 10 issues of the Green Hornet comic book. Somewhere in there it seemed like they had the nuts and bolts of it right....and then Seth Rogen entered the picture.Rogen is one of America's beloved buffoons. Necessary to the American psyche, buffoons have a hallowed place in cinema. From the sidekicks of Gene Autry, Roy Rogers, the Durango Kid, et al to Jerry Lewis, Dick Van Dyke, and Owen Wilson, to the films that serve as a commentary on the buffoon lifestyle (Up In Smoke, Big Lebowski, Knocked Up), each of us has a buffoon we admire. Buffoons generally realize their place in the movies and are usually content to work that vein for all they can. Buffoons are typecast and (usually) should not attempt to crossover to leading man roles. Rogen has attempted that step, I believe (the script makes it hard to tell for sure), and fallen badly in his try.
The script for the Green Hornet was written by Seth Rogen. I have no doubt that he's a very smart man in his area of expertise, but, as of yet, that doesn't include action/adventure. He can't make up his mind if he wants it to be in the action genre, comedy, or thriller, and ends up failing to be any of the above. It never rises above the level of a 10 year old, resorting to violence, explosions, and gunfire in an attempt to cover its inadequacies. Even Rogen's attempts at comedy are, for the most part, unfunny. His Hornet whines and needs constant pampering. There is no attempt to be edgy, moody, or dark. You will not mistake this for The Dark Knight. The premiere of NBC's new show The Cape, seen last week and mediocre at best, was Max Allan Collins meets Raymond Chandler compared to this. Rogen is the Green Hornet in the same manner as it would have been if Benny Hill had been cast as James Bond (which is not totally unlike the Moore James Bond, but that's for another time).
The Green Hornet tv show was made in 1966 on a shoestring budget. The special effects were rudimentary. Yet that old series far outshines this movie. Van Williams played the Hornet as a tough-as-nails and hardcore fighter. Bruce Lee played every fight scene with total energy and effort. Those qualities are simply not to be found here. Even the two serials from the 40's rank one star higher than this, the poorest of entries in the GH family history.
There were two bright spots that I found. First was Jay Chou's portrayal of Kato. While lacking the charisma of Bruce Lee, Chou's Kato was intelligent and witty, a partner rather than a sidekick. I hope to see him in more U.S. movies. The second was an early scene in the movie in Britt's room that showed a poster reproduction of a cover from an issue of Dynamite's Lone Ranger comic. For those that might not know, the Lone Ranger (John Reid) is the great-uncle of the Green Hornet (Britt Reid). The tip of the hat was very nice. Interestingly, in 1980 a revival was attempted of the Lone Ranger. While the movie had a few nice moments it had generated so much bad publicity before it even was released that it bombed. I believe that Rogen's Hornet will make some money if for no other reason than mom and dad being able to take the 10 year olds to it, but quality-wise it actually ranks under the 1980 Lone Ranger.
I really wanted to like this movie. I knew that reconstructing the magic of the series was impossible....I'm not 12 anymore. I went in knowing that things would be different and for the first half hour kept telling myself that it was good. Sooner or later we learn to stop lying to ourselves. Not even Jeff Imada's martial choreography could save it. Here's hoping that it doesn't spawn a series of movies, each one less than the one before it. Masked heroes can be done right....Batman and Spider-Man, case in point. Even Ben Affleck's Daredevil was much better than this. This movie is silly and unintelligent and Seth Rogen should be ashamed of himself. Come to think of it, the producers should be ashamed of themselves because apparently they thought it was some good stuff. Don't waste your money on this one. You'll buy it for the kids, they'll watch it once, and you'll sell it in that garage sale you have every summer. Buy the old series on dvd....you'll keep that, if for no other reason than to watch Bruce.
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